Sedated Koala

Doing things differently since the Carter Administration

The Other Side Of Thirty

     Whoa! How did this happen?!? I’ve landed on the other side of thirty!!!

Oh. My. God! 
Um, yay?

     Geez-o, it’s taken me so long to finish this post! I was sure that I would be on the other side of forty by the time I finished!

     I’ve gotten a lot of advice over the years – some good and some not so good – but many very memorable. Isn’t it interesting that some of the advice we get in life is so important that the other person HAD to share it with you?
     Sometimes, it’s really difficult for people to overcome strange, destructive advice they received when they were young. It is part of what shapes their world. It programs into you a series of mechanisms, movements, and thought processes. People can end up in therapy for years to rid the demons of their past.
     I don’t have the answers to all of life’s questions because I am definitely not a wise woman on a hill, but sometimes it’s great to put that advice into perspective, from the mundane to the seriously important, and have a good laugh (or cry).

Stop worrying about it. 

Not so easy to do in the real world, but you really have to take it easy if you wake the dragon in Carcasonne

No one will ever love you if you’re fat or ugly.

If that were true, these beautifully silly creatures would be extinct.

You can’t trust anyone. 

Nephew took biggest ants one too many times


Tampons should only be used by women who’ve had babies.
And loose women. 

“The sticky side of the pad goes up. 
Love, Grandma”

It’s in the Alamo.

Say Please and Thank You

If you tell someone you are mad, he/she will no longer love you. 

You must shave every possible area of visible leg hair, most of your labia majora, and underarm hair. Don’t forget about those unsightly butt crack hairs. You are a disgusting woman who lives in a tree hut if you don’t shave. 

She didn’t get the memo. Horrifying. Tell your children to look away. 

Never speak up. It is not your place to be assertive. …And how dare you ask again about that salary bump you should have gotten last quarter.

Happy camper.

Take at least a small portion of the casserole, even if you don’t care for it. 

Don’t hurt Great Auntie’s feelings!

You must never smell like a human

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